So, okay, fun fact. When I was a freshman in high school… let me preface by saying my dad sent me to a private school and, like a bad organ transplant, it didn’t take. I was miserable, the student body hated me, I hated them, it was awful.
Okay, so, freshman year, I’m deep in my “everything sucks and I’m stuck with these assholes” mentality. My English teacher was a notorious hard-ass, let’s call him Mr. Hargrove. He was the guy every student prayed they didn’t get. And, on top of ALL OF THE SHIT I WAS ALREADY DEALING WITH, I had him for English.
One of the laborious assignments he gave us was to keep a daily journal. Daily! Not monthly or weekly. Fucking daily. Handwritten. And we had to turn it in every quarter and he fucking graded us. He graded us on a fucking journal.
All of my classmates wrote shit like what they did that day or whatever. But, I did not. No, sir. I decided to give the ol’ middle finger to the assignment and do my own shit.
So, for my daily journal entries, over the course of an entire year, I wrote a serialized story about a horde of man-eating slugs that invaded a small mining town. It was graphic, it was ridiculous, it was an epic feat of rebellion.
And Mr. Hargrove loved it.
It wasn’t just the journal. Every assignment he gave us, I tried to shit all over it. Every reading assignment, everyone gushed about how good it was, but I always had a negative take. Every writing assignment, people wrote boring prose, but I wrote cheesy limericks or pulp horror stories.
Then, one day, he read one of my essays to the class as an example of good writing. When a fellow student asked who wrote it, he said, “Some pipsqueak.”
And that’s when I had a revelation. He wanted to fight. And since all the other students were trying to kiss his ass, I was his only challenger.
Mr. Hargrove and I went head-to-head on every assignment, every conversation, every fucking thing. And he ate it up. And so did I.
One day, he read us a column from the Washington Post and asked the class what was wrong with it. Everyone chimed in with their dumbass takes, but I was the one who landed on Mr. Hargrove’s complaint: The reporter had BRAZENLY added the suffix “ize” to a verb.
That night I wrote a jokey letter to the reporter calling him out on the offense in which I added “ize” to every single verb. I gave it to Mr. Hargrove, who by then had become a friendly adversary, for a chuckle and he SENT IT TO THE REPORTER.
And, people… The reporter wrote back. And he said I was an exceptional student. Mr. Hargrove and I had a giggle about that because we both knew I was just being an asshole, but he and the reporter acknowledged I had a point.
And that was it. That was the moment. Not THAT EXACT moment, but that year with Mr. Hargrove taught me I had a knack for writing. And that knack was based in saying “fuck you” to authority. (The irony that someone in a position of authority helped me realize that is not lost on me.)
So, I can say without qualification that Mr. Hargrove is the reason I am now a professional writer. Yes, I do it for a living. And most of my stuff takes authorities of one kind or another to task.
Mr. Hargrove showed me my dissent was valid, my rebellion was righteous, and that killer slugs could bring a city to its knees. Someone just needs to write it.
This is the first time I’ve seen this post but I know I’m gonna love reading it every time it shows up on my dash
That trope of the, like, All-Purpose Scientist™ can be annoying but also sometimes it’s very fun if it’s in character that they would just. Study everything. Like sometimes it’s suspendably believable. Sometimes a character is like “I’m A Scientist™” and ur like “ok cool what’s your field” and they’re like “Yes” and I can just accept this because they’re Like That
If you have an All-Purpose Scientist™ character you need to have a scene where they count their phds on their fingers
Highlight the absurdity of this person knowing Fucken Everything it’s funny let Dr Science be funny have other academics look at them like “what the fuck? What the fuck?”
If memory serves, what happened was that someone took a video of a Ukrainian military band playing some other song and dubbed a realistic-sounding version of A Cruel Angel’s Thesis over it. This proceeded to be everywhere on the internet, enough so that the band that put on the original performance caught wind of it, and decided to capitalize on its popularity by actually performing the song. This video is the latter version.
Block your address and phone number (i.e., Department of Motor Vehicles,
voter registration, phone company, gas / water / electric company).
Protect Yourself from Stalking
Clearly communicate to the stalker that you want the behavior to stop.
Tell the stalker “no” once and only once. Further communication with the
stalker can be dangerous and may escalate the behavior.
Consider getting a dog. This may provide extra protection
Block your address and phone number (i.e., Department of Motor Vehicles,
voter registration, phone company, gas / water / electric company).
If the stalker gets your home phone number, contact the police.
Phone harassment is against the law. In all likelihood, they will
advise you not to answer those calls. Keep your answering machine on to
record the calls and report each incident. Contact your phone company or
check your phone book for additional phone security options.
Document everything. Keep records of all contact made by the stalker and any unusual situations that occur.
Take a self-defense class. The most effective self-defense classes
emphasize “street smarts” rather than physical strength or skill and
teach you how to deescalate confrontations.
Ask co-workers and roommates to screen calls and visitors.
Destroy discarded mail (i.e., purchase an inexpensive shredder).
Don’t accept packages unless they were personally ordered.
Get a cell phone and keep it with you at all times.
Never be afraid to sound your car horn to attract attention.
Acquaint yourself with all-night stores and other public places in your area that are highly populated.
f you have children in school, contact the school and let them know
about the stalking. Again, fill out a form requesting that your
children’s information not be given out
Find resources for support.
Tell trusted individuals you are being stalked.
x “Opt Out” of any stalker enabling sites like whitepages and beenverified x Do not, if you can help it, park your car or bike on the street while you know you are being stalked (I’m sorry guys) x if you catch your stalker tailing you in their car drive to the police station x Never respond to your stalker past telling them not to contact you. NEVER. Do not have people who are not the cops or a lawyer talk to your stalker for you. x If someone is stalking you and you have mutual friends you must cease contact with that mutual friend. Even if they are close.
x Record meticulously everything that is sent to you or done to you. This is especially critical if your stalker is a stranger because there are many rules about who you can take out a restraining order on and most of them start with having been in an established relationship with your stalker. x Consider taking them to court for emotional distress if the cops are failing you and if you have the resources to do so. x expect that the cops are hard to deal with and dismissive. Still go to them. Your life is more important than your dignity x If you are being actively stalked irl Have a buddy system. Have on an application like “find your friends” with a trusted!!! friend or relative. x if the stalker knows a location you must be like a job and tries to “visit” you there or waits for you in a parking lot or area outside work call the cops about it and have them talk to your stalker. Do not ask work to deal with your stalker. Do not try and deal with them yourself. x if your stalker is using threats of violence and knows where you live please consider a DV shelter. Women die every day because their stalker knows where they live.
update: apparently canberra’s skywhale was harpooned and died
Local resident Michelle Bedford says what she saw can only be described as ‘incredibly unlikely’ and ‘bizarrely beautiful’.
“The guy got on the roof of his van with a crazy look in his eyes I’ve never seen before, as if in his universe there was only him and the Skywhale. He hurled the broomhandle like a harpoon, got it right through the eye.
“We all clapped and cheered, not like we hate the Skywhale or anything but it was just unbelievably cool.”
It then took several hours for security staff and onlookers to disentangle Ahab from the corpse of the Skywhale which had slowly but majestically fallen directly on top of him, like a heavenly blanket with massive breasts.
The sculpture, a hot air balloon depicting a whale as it may have evolved if it lived in the air rather than the sea, has had a mixed reception since it was first launched in 2013. Critics of the Skywhale cited its outlandish appearance, large breast-like appendages and ‘dumb, smug whale face’.
…
Artist Patricia Piccinini, who designed the sculpture, has asked that charges not be pressed against Mr Ahab, claiming that she was “invigorated” to see the public engaging with the artwork on such a meaningful level and that she couldn’t ask for a “more fitting way for a big balloon that looks like a whale to complete its lifecycle in the public eye.”
When asked if the ‘killing’ of the Skywhale had any allegorical significance or if the quest to find and destroy it was in some way symbolic of a larger tale Mr Ahab told reports “Nah mate, just f-ing hate that bloody whale.”
today i bought a chocolate bar just because i really liked the graphic design
but the bar itself is also really cool looking? i found a diagram that says exactly how big each piece is
the wikipedia article reads like an ad but i gotta say, this part in particular is pretty fun
#why is the bar designed like that #it doesnt make it easier to eat #it doesnt make it easy to track portion size??? #this makes no sense #the slavery free thing is just a cherry on top of this weird cake
it is, apparently, intended as a metaphor for the inequality of distribution of profit in the chocolate industry
Tony’s Chocolonely’s entire thing is that they’re fighting for a slavery free chocolate industry, you guys should check them out!
